It will be difficult to break the habits of thinking Abnegation instilled in me, like tugging a single thread from a complex work of embroidery. But I will find new habits, new thoughts, new rules. I will become something else.
“Then I realize what it is. It’s him. Something about him makes me feel like I am about to fall. Or turn to liquid. Or burst into flames.”
Title: Good Morning Midnight
I would have gone to the Little Palace and been spoiled and pampered. I would have dined off of golden plates, and I never would have struggled to use my power. It would have been like breathing, the way it always should have been. And in time, I would have forgotten Keramzin
In the conservatory at Tomikyana, Alina tells Mal what their story would have been if the Grisha Examiners had discovered her power, if she had been taken to the Little Palace as a child. This is that tale, from the very beginning, to the bitter end.
Characters: Alina Starkov, The Darkling, Malyen Oretsev, literally everyone else.
Pairings: Alina/Darkling, Alina/Mal
Notes/Warnings: Canon levels of violence and potentially death in future chapters. And the Darkling is his grooming manipulative self (you may or may not consider this a good thing). This will be a multiship fic.
read @ao3, or continue below!
Alina’s new rooms changed things.
Maybe it was because she had been so unused to people looking at her before, that she was so attuned to them now. Alina imagined that if people looked at you all the time, you’d start to get used to it - and it occurred to her uneasily that in the future, that might happen to her as well.
But it hadn’t happened yet, so when the eager desire to get to know her shifted into something more calculating, cautious, she noticed. People no longer fell over themselves trying to sit next to her, but instead took their time, communicating amongst themselves with a strange mixture of whispers and Significant Looks.
Slowly, Alina started to realise that a hierarchy was forming. Instead of being first in first served, she noticed that the people sitting nearest to her in class settled, like a pool of water after something large and unnatural is tossed into it. There was a boy, Sergei, who simultaneously tried to assert his superiority while deferring to her, and a girl called Marie, who seemed to take Alina’s natural reticence as a challenge, chattering a little nervously at her throughout the day.
Lunars were a society that had evolved from an Earthen moon colony centuries ago,but they weren’t human anymore. People said Lunars could alter a person’s brain - make you see things you shouldn’t see, feel things you shouldn’t feel, do things you didn’t want to do. Their unnatural power had made them a greedy and violent race, and Queen Levana was the worst of all of them.
I’ll inject you with a serum that stimulates the part of your brain that processes fear. […] It induces a hallucination, and the transmitters in the serum allow me to see the images in your mind.